I'm so pissed and embarrased

Hubby thinks I should keep things to myself. However, this is my blog and it's my story and frankly I need to get it off my chest.

I was failed for clinical because they didn't like me!!! I was failed because I was too much of an eager beaver!!! Because I am too assertive!!! Is that enough punctuation marks for you?!

I'm pissed at them... and at myself that I can't keep my emotions in check. That I am passionate about being a nurse and trying to get my BSN.

Hubby warned me that my placement had stuff on the internet that indicated that they are known to be like this.... of course this was the last day that he informed me of this. And it was rather too late to do anything about it.

I can't believe that I get 3 1/2 yrs into my degree again and this sort of thing happens and puts a big stop to it. I can't believe I'm being stopped again. All because clinical is subjective.

At no point was anything that was told to me about whether I was a bad nurse/incompetent - just that I rubbed people the wrong way. And that they were under the impression that I was there to OBSERVE and not actually DO anything!!!! like WTH???!!!! What clinical placement is observational?!

The only upside is that my clinical faculty advisor sees things as being primarily interpersonal and is willing to give me a second chance.

Unfortunately, she wants me to come to the university but I can't get a temporary license because I can't get one of the aspects required for it and so now I think I'm pretty screwed. I will find out tomorrow I guess. I don't know what options I have now :(

I had difficulty finding a hospital in the first place and now I can't do placement at this one (not that I want to anymore). UGH!!!! WHY MUST THIS BE SO HARD????????