When the will is overrun by family decisions

How does it come to be that families can make the decisions for family members in critical care, when they themselves have made it known what they would choose for their life and their death?!

When someone comes in for a fairly basic surgery (albeit an emergent one) and have a perioperative MI and when they are woken are told what has occured and that they require a cardiac catheterization - to which they decide that they would prefer to not undertake this.

The surgeon (or whoever it actually was - a MD none the less) had a frank conversation with said patient and indicated that the catheterization wasn't performed, that a major heart attack would occur.

The patient, in right mind, made the decision that they would not have this procedure performed, even if that meant that they would have a heart attack.

Then advised that they could die if this occurs, the patient indicated that that was alright and that should a heart attack occur, no CPR/defib or intubation occur. Meaning that nothing should be undertaken if a heart attack is to occur and survival not be possible.

Now the twist in this entire story is the fact that the health care person who had this conversation, and could write it down and make it official, DIDN'T WRITE AN ORDER!!! All they did was put it in their notes. Friggin idiot!

So of course this person had a massive heart attack and went into an unsurvivable cardiac rhythm (VF to VT) and they called a code and managed to get this person back.

Then of course it's family who decides what the next steps will be. Even though the family find out what the patient said to the MD, they still decide to do everything in our power to get this person through this.

Now after some time has passed, this person is basicly a vegetable - doing very little more than lying in bed and existing.

I feel for this patient - ending up in this state after indicating exactly what they don't want and because of an oversight, ended up having everything done they didn't want. Now they have to live with the consequences of this and what their family is choosing for them.

If I were them, I'd come back and haunt my family after I actually get to die. That's the least that they deserve for making me suffer as a vegetable in bed. Such a pity of a life. No quality at all.