A big week coming

This week is kinda big in my life. This week I have a meeting with the surgeon who will determine if I get to go back to work and if I get to have the weekend shifts that I feel I need.

Then I have a meeting with Oc health, my manager and my union rep to determine WHEN I can go back to work. Goodness I hope it's soon!

These two things will determine WHEN I get to go home for Christmas - one things that this family will NOT let me celebrate here - so I REALLY REALLY want to go home. Plus my two brothers are shit heads and tend to spend more time with their wife's side of the family and therefore if if I didn't go home, then my mama would be left alone (and her hubby is a bigger shit head and doesn't know how to celebrate properly and always inevitably screws up the celebration) so there's just me to help her celebrate christmas.

Plus little tyke LOVES all the lights of christmas and keeps enquiring WHEN christmas is going to be. She doesn't understand why exactly we don't celebrate in this household and it's next to impossible to tell a 4 yr old and have her truely understand. So I'm happy that we get to go up to mom's house and celebrate all the awesomeness that goes along with the holidays. If only Eid was celebrated in the same manner, then maybe her and I would be excited about it as well.

Boy did I enjoy myself

When I was pregnant I just KNEW that I was pregnant with a DD - and I was eccstatic. I've always dreamed of having one, being able to do her hair, dress her up and enjoy all the "girly" things that come along with having a daughter. Now while I got the daughter, I didn't necessarily get all the "daughter" to go along with the daughter. I got a little girl who LOVES to dress up and put on dresses but she LOVES short hair. Something that's frustrating to me. I want to be able to do braids and pony's and she just won't let me - ugh.

Halloween was fun this year though because she got so involved in the matter. We picked out her costume - a fairy. And she said the funniest thing... "I'm going to flap my wings and fly to every house so that I can get candy" - oh my goodness she has such an imagination! THIS is one of the main reasons why I want to be a nurse in a paeds ward - the things that come out of their mouths!

I'll leave you with a pic of the little tyke

Crazy adventure part 3

Daughter woke up around 1030 hrs and so I sent her downstairs to "hang out" with papa and he okayed me to head back to bed since I didn't sleep at night being that I drove all night.

I woke with about 45 min remaining in my mom's shift and then grabbed the little tyke and headed to go surprise "nana". When we got to the store I did a bit of grocery shopping and then headed towards the cashiers checkouts. Unfortunately she was on express which means every customer wants to go through her because it's usually the fastest lane.

I tried to keep out of her line of vision but I also wanted to stop ppl from going in her lane because I knew that as soon as she saw us she would stop working and leave that person hanging.

I ended up coming out from behind the banana stand that I was hiding behind when there was just one woman left and she was ALMOST finished her order

To say that she was SHOCKED is an understatement!

She first saw the little tyke and she did a double take - then she like jumped up and down and it was almost like she squealed with glee. She stopped the lady's order and came around her till to come give us a hug.

She was soooooooooooo shocked that she started crying, apologizing to the lady for not completing her order. Lady said she didn't mind, she would have done the same thing if her daughter did the same thing that i did. The lady actually teared up as well. It was awesome and was glad that I kept it a complete secret and surprised her like I did.

Afterwards we did a bit of grocery shopping and then went back to the house to check on my dad because heaven forbid we leave him alone for more than 5 hrs --> or at least that's the way my mom was thinking!

I phoned around and let everyone know that I was in town and that we would have a huge family dinner the next day. Then I headed up to my BFF's workplace - a nursing home - to surprise her next.

When I got there it was dinner time so at least I didn't have to wonder around the nursing home lost. It only took me several dinner room areas to find her. When she saw me she didn't even seem shocked which suprrised me more than anything. Afterwards she told me that she was shocked but that she was so exhausted (she's 4 months preggo ATM) that her brain was on auto mode.

Then I headed back to the house to have a bite to eat and a couple of people popped into the house to visit. About 1100hrs BFF called and said that she was done work and asked me if I wanted to head to her place to see her new digs (she bought a house about a month earlier so I was excited to go see it). I had already put the kiddo to bed and took dad's cell in case kiddo woke up. Of course seeing your BFF is sooooooooo different in person than it is over the phone and we had so much catching up to do. We were sooooo chatty that he didn't realize the time flying by and when I looked at the clockm it was already 0300 and I jumped up and said that I would head out seeing as we both had to get up early. But not surprisingly we got held up at the door chatting some more and by the time I actually walked out her door it was 0400. Lets just say that I slept good that night!

The rest of my visit was the same - lots of visitors and lots of late nights (tho that was the latest).

All in all it was an awesome vacation and wish I lived closer where I could just get in my car and go and visit.

A thing of beauty!!!

I'm slowly getting better. Yesterday hubby and I took the little tyke to the hairdressers and had her hair chopped off into a bob - I think it perfectly suits her.... and makes it so that right now she cannot suck on her hair (disgusting coping habit that she has) which is a GREAT thing!!! Here's a pic of the beauty...

She is absolutely beautiful! Sometimes I wonder how I ever made such a beautiful little girl. I hope that this haircut will stop her from sucking on her hair and now JUST her thumb, guess we'll see though. I love her to bits and pieces regardless.

Something funny the little tyke said...

So lately my darling daughter has been cursing, like a truck driver, or a sailor. Either one is a fitting description. And she will do it at the ODDEST times! And it has us giggling up a storm.... which doesn't help to curb it but seeing it from such a cutie is difficult to stifle oneself from laughing.

Take this evening for instance....

I was sitting on the couch, and I've been trying to potty train the dear darling for the past week. Some success I might add. And today happened to be a trying day as far as peeing on the potty goes. So when she had told me that she had peed NOT on the toilet but in her pull up I told her (in no uncertain terms) that she HAD to go sit on the potty.

And WHAT is the responsible from my not even three year old???..... "that's BULLSHIT mommy"

OMG!!!! I couldn't believe she had said it (she's only said it once before - cuz it's not something she hears of much). And the fact that she had said it in a manner that would totally apply to this situation. Oh yeah, the whole room of ppl started giggling as mommy tried to be stern (with not much luck) and mutter "little tyke that's not nice, we don't say those things and you HAVE to still sit on the potty" and of course I included the "mommy" look for good measure and off she went to sit on the potty.

WOW - what am I going to do with this one?!

More on her growing antics another day tho! I shall leave you with a couple of pics of her....

She was telling me that she was going to go "bye bye" - in her PJ's with sandles on and it was snowing outside - oh and it was like 11pm at night!!!! YA NO!

My little sassy girl - quite the diva she is... hope it's not indicative of what I should expect in 10+ yrs!

I need to live somewhere else!!!

Living in this house is starting to make me depressed. Can you believe that I actually escape TO the gym???!!!! I thought that THAT would never happen but alas it does! I wish I could have tonight but unfortunately, today is "family day" for those of you Canadians - "President's day" for those American folk who read this blog, and with that comes early closure times or not open at all.... and my gym closed aat 3pm today. And of course when I wanted to escape, it was after that time.

The next best thing... a bubble bath, BY MYSELF!!!! I locked myself in my in-law's bathroom for an hour and a half and caught up on Pan Am and just enjoyed the quietness. The awesome thing about their bath tub is that it has jets... which is UBER fun with a bit of bubble bath.... INSTANT bubbles. And when the bubbles get too high, you turn off the jets for a bit and the bubbles go down. When they get a little too low, turn the jets back on and voila bubbles again!

Now of COURSE hubby tried to come into the bathroom.... which I wouldn't let him - he'd just interfere with my serenity. Then came little tyke- who OF COURSE insisted that SHE needed a bath. And I mean, who could blame her. So I let her in after listening to her bang on the door and whine for about three minutes. She LOVES baths now so it was fun watching her enjoy the bubbles. Of course hubby could hear that I let the billa (nickname for her) into the bathroom so he had to come and bug us. It was fun while it lasted and seemed to poop out the little tyke .and once bathtime was done I put lotion on her (with her help and insistence of course) and pajamas then off to bed she went.... without much of a fight either I might add!!!

Sometimes I just hate being in such a small house with sooo many ppl in here. It's cramped and we don't have a viable living area for just us. It sucks!!! It makes me frustrated and angry and depressed many times. It also sucks that when stuff happens around this house that I am not included in ANY of the communications because it's done in Urdu and I certainly don't understand enough of it. Of course none of his family (incl. hubby anymore) takes this into account because they're selfish (IMO) and could care less that I don't understand.

Many times I wish that I could fast forward a year and a half and be in Texas already!!! I want to be finished school, I want my RN degree to be completed and I want my OWN house with hubby SOMEWHERE ELSE!!!!!!!!!!!! Where it's JUST US (and kids of course).

I know this is probably not the lightest of posts but there it is... my REAL life!

A bit off the grid I know

I know I've been off the grid for a bit - sorry about that, it's not that I have been working (much), but rather studying my ass off and working a bit of my ass off (haha).

The little tyke went to England for 12 days, she just got back last friday, and of course I had to work all weekend - and not for lack of trying to trade out of it either! So I saw my little girl very little for the past 3 weeks-ish.

While she was away, I signed up for a gym membership. It's about time that I lose this extra weight. When I had the kiddo 10 yrs ago, I went from being 130 lbs to 198 lbs. It took me about a year and a half to get down to 160 lbs-ish and I felt pretty good. Then I had all that crap with school and the teacher and gained a bunch and then went on anti depressants and gained to the point that I weighed 210 lbs. I said to myself "screw this crap, the anti depressants aren't really helping cuz I'm depressed that I weigh so much." And I was even exercising daily AND watching when and what I was eating, and I was STILL gaining weight! So I went off the anti depressants an lost 30 lbs in a month and a half!

I had married my hubby at this point and we decided that we were going to start trying to have a baby. So I wanted to lose as much as I could before getting pregnant and I got down to 175 lbs when we found out that I was pregnant with the little tyke. I gained 35 while I was pregnant, which I thought wasn't too bad but could have done better. Now I weigh 193 lbs and figure that no time like the present to do something MORE about my weight. I convinced hubby that going to the gym is the best choice for me and he was okay with me getting a personal trainer. Having the little tyke away in England was like the perfect time to start because I could go to the gym at any point, not mattering if there was someone to watch her. ALSO, the gym that I go to has 4 days that they're open 24 hrs/day which is perfect for me as I get the desire to exercise later at night, sometimes as late as 2am! I know, I'm a weird one but I just go with it.

So I've had 2 times with the personal trainer now and she's focusing on getting my abd muscles stronger and my arms, since I told her that I do leg strength weights on the days that I don't have the trainer. And HOLY CRAP did my arms KILL after she's done with me. Last week I had one session with the trainer and I had to work the next day, WOW was it hard to do my job!!!! Sometimes it felt like my arms weighed a million pounds and it was just an effort to even lift my arms, let alone push, pull, or lift a patient! It's been 3 weeks (as of yesterday) since I've started, and although I've gained a pound, I can see a change in my body already. My tummy has gone down a little bit and my butt is tightening a smidge, and my boobs have gotten smaller (SUCH a shame I tell ya!!!).

Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays

Merry christmas everyone!

Last night the family went to a cousin's house and had christmas eve dinner there. We didn't get home until about 10:30, put the kids straight to bed and hubby and I watched some tv via the net. I told my eldest, who's 10yrs, that he couldn't wake us until 8am. And he ALMOST listened - he woke us at 7:45am.... too bad I didn't get ANY sleep last night. Unfortunately it wasn't for lack of trying either....

Little tyke sprung a fever in the middle of the night and was sporting quite the diaper rash, so she woke me up being MISERABLE! I changed her bum and of course, she woke up enough that she thought that we should then wake up.... uhhh I don't think so!!! She made me make her a fresh bottle and back to bed we went.

When kiddo woke up, he first went and had a shower (like I had talked to him about having the night before) and then he came to wake us up... poor mommy made him wait the 15 minutes to open presents. Such torture I know, but hey, I learned from the best - MY parents. Hahahaha

Then I allowed little girl to turn on the tree and we opened gifts. Since kiddo's the oldest I let him be responsible for handing out the gifts, not that I didn't have to give a few reminders that he had to take time to enjoy people OPENING their gifts.

All in all the kids enjoyed opening their presents. They enjoyed what they received and I had a ball watching them through the entire process. I even got a couple of pictures. Too bad I don't know where my camera is right now and I had to use my new phone (which I'm still working out the kinks for), so we'll see what kind of quality I will get.

Now if you didn't already know, I AM a muslim - but that doesn't mean that I have to leave my roots - my culture behind just because I found myself a different religion. This is something that my husband and his family struggle with. They equate celebrating christmas to celebrating another religion's holiday. HOWEVER, the way I was raised was that there was no religion in play, just simple giving and receiving of love, presents, time and happiness....... oh and a good ol' homecooked turkey (which I'm having tomorrow since I'm a bonehead and forgot to take it out early enough.

Well there's more to say, but I have to get to bed, I have to wake up early to get my turkey ready for the oven.