Lots to say

I'll squeeze a few things into this post....

I cut my hair last about 2 years ago - there were two wedding scheduled and so I was told in no amount of words that I was NOT allowed to cut my hair - one wedding was my BFF's and I was her maid of honour and she wanted us to get updo's and I love her so of course I gave into her desires. The other wedding was my BIL whom I detest (loathe actually) and my MIL told me that I was not allowed to cut it and threatened to disown me (essentially) if I cut it - BOY was THAT tempting!!! But hubby begged me and so for HIM and him alone I didn't cut it. Then I entered clinical time and it's usually preferred that the hair be tied back - so I delayed and delayed and delayed... so that takes me to my next point...

I passed clinical!!! Now some may say that that isn't much of an achievement, but this is the course in which I was failed for. THIS course is the bane of my existence! My preceptor said that I did great, and that I'll make an excellent nurse (already am one btw - wasn't about to say that to her though!)

So I went and chopped all my hair off (from the middle of my back to JUST below my ears) as a present - came home and hubby was awake (surprising since he worked nights yesterday) and he was shocked but loved it. MIL started complaining (in Urdu of course) about my haircut - oh well she's not the one I'm with so that doesn't matter much. Now today I'm going to dye it (a shocking color)...

and that leads to my third point - my BFF flies in today! YAY!!!!!!!! I'm super uber excited. Her and her 5 month old daughter are coming for 5 days. I can't wait to see them! i miss BFF like crazy - we haven't been talking much since the birth of her daughter cuz she's not working and because her daughter is a morning person (yuck!) and so she now goes to bed uber early - which means when I get off work and want to chat she's not available and when she wants to talk, I'm usually sleeping so I'm not available - it's like 2 ships passing in the night. We talk now about twice a month whereas we WERE talking about 2+ times a week. I miss it and I miss her. So I'm stoked that they're coming here. I'm also going to get her to dye my hair - easy to get her to do it than for me to struggle to make sure I get everything covered properly. I'll try to post a pic...

Actually enjoying clinical

I've gone to clinical twice now and was really, really worried that I would hate it or that my clinical preceptor would hate me. Turns out we click BIG TIME!

Terry (not her real name) is a gorgeous outgoing black african american woman who is wonderful. I get to her house an hour before we leave, just to speak about how our day is expected to go, the type of patients we'll be seeing and what she expects of me. I like this because then I know what to expect and I can try to make sure I meet them.

One of the patient's we have is a 90+ woman who lives several states over from her only surviving child, who is a boy and he acts like one. My pt complains that they don't have a good relationship and that she has hinted that she would prefer to live closer but doesn't say it exactly like that so it's not like he recognizes it and so as time keeps going on she just gets more and more bitter. (my mom is the same way with one of my brothers so it was ironic that I could totally see it in this exchange) She is depressed and anxious and has openly admitted that she wants to die but won't commit suicide (as per her religious beliefs). She isolates herself because all of her exchanges with the people in her retirement home alienate her. I found it difficult trying to counsel her on changing her behavior. I just don't have the knack for these things. What I DID do was talk to her about her self isolating behavior and to make a verbal agreement to go to a social event at least once this week and she was required to sit by someone she hadn't previously communicated with and when we meet this week we would talk about it and how it went. I hope it goes well!

Then after our day we go back to her house and debrief how our day went. She complemented me (YAY!!!) about how well I'm doing and that I met her expectations for our day.

I will be VERY excited when this rotation is done and over with - just hope it's successful!!!

Finally a beacon of hope

In about October I was notified via email that the next course would be a psych course (already knew this but was reminded of it) and was told to begin the search to find a suitable placement. I believe I've said it before but it really irks me (maybe a tad more ;P) that I have to find my OWN placement as well as preceptor while the school sits back and does jack shit except do the clinical contract with the facility. Complete bullshit IMO. The old school that I was going to (for my LPN/RPN as well as my previous BSN) did this leg work for us (and was compensated IMO for this) which made life easier and certainly less stressful. This was something that I asked before committing myself to this school because I don't think it should be my responsibility to do this.

So for this semester my hubby thought to find a list of ALL the NPs and so I began calling them ALL - EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM!!! And was told that if I didn't find a preceptor in that two week period of time that I would have to abandon that course! So off I went asking whether they would be willing to "oversee" a basic review of assessments that I would do in front of them. Only ONE off a list of probably 30-40 ppl said yes. And OMG am I thankful to this person!!! Told her everytime I saw her! I was certainly stressed out and certainly worried that I would have to postpone starting my core nursing courses because of this stupid thing that I was told by the university to wait on until I was officially "IN" the course. It's complete bullshit IMO and I should have been advised of this.

Now getting back to October... I procrastinated on finding a suitable placement and figured that the school would do ANY of the leg work. Now it's December and I come to find that the school basically did jack shit in terms of helping me. A couple of days ago hubby wanted me to start doing the same thing as before but now focusing on calling the "key" people in the hospitals who would enable me to have a pysch rotation in the hospital. Focused on big hospitals and then I decided to broaden my search to smaller ones. Then hubby had an epiphany that it would be smart to check out the psychiatric nurses' association. I figured it couldn't hurt anything and off we went calling them. They instructed us on how to find the local chapter ppl and then we went off googling these people to see about contacting them directly to see if I could network with them to find a placement. Hell these people wouldn't be part of this association if they weren't somehow involved in psychiatry right?!

Next day I called up a couple of people and happened upon one lady who said that so long as I was allowed to do it at an out-pt clinic or in ppl's homes then she could help me. YAAAAYYYYYYYYYY OMG I was eccstatic. The relief was immense let me tell you!

Now I'm trying to convince hubby to register for next semester's courses. He doesn't seem overly keen on this idea though (not sure of the exact reasoning seeing as he told me that once I secured a placement then we would register being that we'd been in this sort of predicament already right).

So I started the paperwork with the uni to get the contract going so that in January I can start my placement hours. The good thing (though weird) is that for that course it only requires FORTY hours. Crazy low amount, very shocking to me and to the lady I spoke with. I don't really care so long as I get the hours in.

Life is busy

School has started in full force. I FOUND A NP WHO WILL BE MY PRECEPTOR - THANK YOU RV!!! I can't believe that someone who doesn't know me and has never met me and has only talked to this crazy nursing student who randomly called them up would be willing to help me out. Either way, I'm eternallly grateful. Even better it that she's already sent in the paperwork AND she's been approved!!!

I caught a nasty cold - makes life a bit more difficult as the energy level has plumetted which makes doing school work & required readings tricky. I'm TRYING to keep up!

I have a cultural competence paper & test to do before sunday. I also have a teaching & learning test to do before then as well. Now the tricky bit is is that I have a scope scheduled for thurs which may take me out of commission for several days. Hopefully not any longer than that.

I did my preop stuff today. The nurse there knows what surgery I'm having and she mentioned that she didn't think that I would be back to work before the new year - holy shit batman, I can't be off work that long. I was only expecting to be off another month AT THE MOST!!!

School costs me $5,000 per SEMESTER and so I NEED to go back to work. I have school to pay for. I would rather NOT go into debt if I can help it.

I'm looking forward to getting this health stuff fixed, it hurts & is itchy and it makes walking more difficult. Not looking forward to the bowel prep though! Don't know of anyone who does. I'll know more about what the agenda is for surgery after the scope. Doc tried to call me today but don't know why - I get to find out tomorrow.

Again I'm getting screwed over

I started school this week - YAY for me. Also found out that i need to find my OWN preceptor, in a state I DON'T reside in. Well THIS should be fun! And it has to be done like yesterday. I've tried posting several places on facebook and on allnurses.com but haven't had any bites yet. I hope I hear something tomorow or else I'm gonig to have to drop this course and I REALLY don't want to have to do that!